Feedback Thoughts

How I am going to hopefully Unhurt my feelings preemptively in the future:

Seven Ways to Crush Self Doubt in Creative Work

I have heard time and time again that comparison is the thief of joy, it’s true and I need to be reminded of that constantly as a chronic “I wish I was [insert someone I think is cooler than me’s name]”-er. I think we all need to be reminded of that sometimes. Beyond that valuable information, trusting in oneself is valuable advice as well, and is a muscle I need to be reminded to exercise as well, and it is a hard one. This article iterated a lot of good and helpful advice for someone who is constantly unsure of her own ideas and if they are worth exposing to the world- I think a lot of people have that same self doubt, and it is kind of sad. I need to remind myself to cut it out, and this article is a good and positive piece of advice.

Why It’s So Hard to Hear Negative Feedback

I am someone who struggles a lot a lot with negative feedback, or perceived negative feedback and perceiving rejection. I clicked on this article right away because I knew it would be pertinent to me and my various neuroticisms. The author says something that absolutely slapped me:

“The solution to this problem on both sides — whether you’re receiving the feedback or giving it — boils down to trusting that everyone is participating in good faith.“

I stopped in my tracks, I wasn’t moving but if I had been I would have been frozen, and stopped to consider how poignant this was to me personally. I can recall examples of criticisms that I have taken more poorly than could be scripted that I perceived as affronts to the core of my person, and it was because I believe that the other party was participating out of malice and one sided-ness. This is true for some of them, I am a twenty something who is friends with a bunch of twenty somethings and we are all selfish and self centered a good portion of the time- I am no exception and neither are my friends, but I think that is part of being a twenty something. I am going to, however, make an effort to believe that sometimes these criticisms are truly meant to be constructive and to build me up rather than tear me down as they have so many times. 

Me, responding to any feedback that isn’t explicitly positive